Published by IVP on September 16, 2025
Genres: Non-Fiction, Memoir
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"You should write a book about me, so I can be famous like you."
Five-time New York Times bestselling author Kathleen Norris fulfills this wish expressed by her sister Rebecca "Becky" Sue with this heartfelt and honest memoir of sisterhood, disability, and resilience.
Known for her insightful reflections on faith and life, Norris ventures into new territory in Rebecca Sue, sharing an intimate portrait of her younger sister. Becky's life was shaped by lifelong mental and physical disabilities. Though Becky was aware of her limitations and the frustrations they brought, she refused to be defined by them. This story, told from a sister's perspective, paints a picture of Becky's complex life, from her hopes, sense of humor, frustrations, and hardships to her journey from bitterness and anger to a life characterized by gratitude.
Norris' love for her sister is palpable as she presents a full and honest portrait of a woman who, like all of us, longed for love, family, and a place to belong. Weaving her memories with Becky's own words drawn from her letters and journals, Norris examines parts of her own story, the strength of familial bonds, the complexity of caregiving, and the myriad ways God works in our lives.
In Rebecca Sue, you will discover:
stories that resonate with those who have loved ones with disabilities, offering the comfort of shared experience.
a candid and vulnerable portrayal as Norris balances the heaviness and hardships brought on by Becky’s diagnosis of perinatal hypoxia with the joy and hope in her life.
a testament to how unwavering love, perseverance, and commitment can guide a family through life's most arduous journeys.This book is a heartfelt and realistic exploration of relationships, resilience, and faith, perfect for anyone drawn to stories of human connection or those who belong to or support the disability community. Rebecca Sue weaves a powerful story of perseverance, love, and the unexpected ways people find strength during life's toughest moments. Discover Becky's unforgettable story―one that celebrates sisterhood and God's sustaining presence.
Unlike most memoirs, Rebecca Sue doesn’t focus on the author. Instead, Kathleen Norris focuses on the story of her sister. As Norris explains at the beginning of the book, Becky Sue suffered a traumatic brain injury during her birth, and this resulted in permanent cognitive and developmental disabilities. Norris reflects on ways that her family navigated the resulting challenges, and she gives a voice to her sister’s experiences while also weaving in her own memories and perspectives.
Becky Sue understood what had happened to her, and she struggled with anger and resentment over her unfair circumstances, her limitations, and ways that people mistreated her. She also dealt with some serious mental health issues, which her family struggled to know how to support. Although this book comes from a sister’s perspective, it focuses on Becky Sue’s experiences as an individual, not just what life was like for her family members. Norris directly incorporates Becky Sue’s voice, quoting excerpts from letters and sharing memories from their phone conversations.
Norris wrote this book as a series of short vignettes, sharing memories and reflections that build on each other to share the story of her sister’s life. She writes about core experiences from their early years, and then she writes about Becky Sue’s history of troubled relationships and experiences in and out of group homes, as the family struggled to find the right balance between providing support and encouraging her independence. Readers who have cognitively disabled or mentally ill loved ones will relate to the tension between needing to overlook some things and give grace, while also needing to provide accountability.
There is a trigger warning at the beginning, which mentions that this book covers the impacts of sexual assault, as well as compulsive sexual behavior. There are never graphic details, but a significant emphasis in the middle of the book is on Becky Sue’s sexual acting out with a string of men who disappointed her. The author reflects on the exploitative nature of many of these relationships, due to Becky Sue’s cognitive disability, and she expresses the family’s powerlessness to help her.
The vignettes covering Becky Sue’s later years involve the author in a more active role, since she became her sister’s primary caregiver after their parents’ deaths. During these years, Becky Sue grew in contentment and began to have a more outward focus, forging meaningful relationships with her medical care team as she battled health issues and continued dealing with psychiatric problems. Norris also shares reflections on God and faith throughout the book, especially towards the end. This is never a huge emphasis, but is an undercurrent throughout.
Rebecca Sue: A Sister’s Reflections on Disability, Faith, and Love is a testament to the author’s love for her sister, and I appreciate how she represents her sister as an individual with a complex inner world, instead of just writing about her in relation to the other family members. However, even though Becky Sue technically gave her sister permission to write a book about her someday, the number of intimate details that Norris included gave me pause. She received Becky Sue’s medical records after her death, and she quotes from them here, giving complete strangers information about her sister’s medical and psychiatric evaluations and treatments.
I don’t know how Becky Sue would feel about this, but if one of my siblings published detailed quotes from my medical or psychological records after my death, I would be furious. Although reading the medical records was clearly helpful for Norris’s personal processing, she shared far more than was necessary to contextualize things for her readers. I also question the wisdom of sharing so many details about Becky Sue’s problematic relationship history and sexual issues. Families facing similar issues may appreciate the straightforward, nuanced portrayal of a taboo topic, but it sometimes feel voyeuristic.
Rebecca Sue is a unique, powerful memoir that grapples honestly with difficult, complex topics. People with similar family struggles will feel seen, and this book can help other people better understand the challenges of living with mental health issues and developmental disabilities. If someone comes here looking for hope and encouragement, they will find this memoir very bleak. However, if you approach it as a sad story that is full of honesty and grace, it can be a powerful reading experience.